Think about what’s worked for you in the past in dealing with relationships, work and other areas of your life. What’s your default way of being?
Are you organized?
Smart?
Funny?
Quiet?
Loud?
Angry?
Nice?
Outspoken?
It might be time to let go of that.
“Are you crazy??” you say. “That’s what I DO! That’s what works for me!”
That’s great that it’s worked. I’m not saying to abandon it.
What I am saying is this. Anything we hold onto keeps us from moving forward in our lives. Typically, we think of the stuff that we’re holding on to as our fears, our blame, our resentments and our pain from the past.
That kind of stuff definitely holds us back. And, there are also things we hold onto that are not as obvious.
First of all, let’s talk about what it means to move forward in our lives. This is a little tricky, because I don’t mean that there’s a place you need to get to or a state of being that you need to reach.
You already are everything you need to be. You already are exactly where you need to be.
What I’m talking about is ALLOWING that into your daily life. Having your experiences reflect what you are – joy, peace, love, abundance.
I’m talking about being in the flow of being YOU.
How do you do this? By living in your authenticity. (You can read more about this in my ebook.)
And how do you do THAT?
By letting go of what isn’t you.
When you’re in a situation that feels stressful or scary and you find something that works, that takes care of the situation, then you go back to feeling safe again. When it works over and over again, it feels REALLY safe.
After awhile, it moves from a strategy you use when it’s needed, to armor you use all the time. And you can’t be yourself, you can’t be authentic and truly connected with others, when you’re holding a shield between you and the world.
ANYTHING can be a shield.
In the Clear Your Fears teleseminar I’m leading, one of the participants “broke up” with anger this week. She and anger had been partnering most of her life. During our group clearing call on Monday, she asked anger to take a form and he appeared as a suave, well-dressed man. She realized how anger had helped her and protected her, and that she no longer needed that. She lovingly – and sadly – released him to go help someone else now.
Your shield may be anger. It might be being nice, or being logical, or falling apart, or worrying, or focusing on others instead of yourself.
I’m not saying that there’s anything wrong with any of these. They each serve their purpose and can be an extremely useful and appropriate response in certain situations.
The problems come when:
- You go there unconsciously, by default, whether or not it’s appropriate for THIS situation or not. When it’s not your AUTHENTIC reaction.
- You use it to create distance – between you and others, you and your feelings, you and Life as it’s happening right now.
The more secure you feel – from the inside out – the more easily you can let go of your shield and armor. Maybe you’ll be ready to send yours off to someone else who needs them, allowing you to be more fully, deeply, joyfully you.
What are you using as a shield?
What would it be like to be free to just be YOU?